Truth #9

Something you have to forgive yourself for:

 I have to forgive myself for September 18, 2011.  A day I could not control.  A day that if it hadn't happened I would not have what I have today.  Why did the darkest day of my life have to bring one of the brightest?  I could not and still cannot talk about it with anyone in a meaningful way because I don't understand it myself.  I don't want to hear platitudes, I don't want to listen to someone else share their experience, I don't want false reassurances.  

Forgiving yourself is the hardest thing to do.  I can forgive others in a snap, but to forgive myself, I'm not sure if I will ever fully get there.  I will try.  I will keep trying. 

A final salute

Standing straight and tall
A soldier until the last
The trumpet sounded
The battle was won
He made it home
And life went on
Have no fear
For we are still here
Your legacy remains.

With a wink and a smile
We send you on with love
To be with those above.

For my grandpa, Louis Sadowski, WW2 Veteran, Royal Canadian Engineers.  Thank you for your service to Canada.  Lest we Forget.  

September

Oh September, what a crazy busy time you are!  Back to school, work ramps up, nights become cooler, sunny days are getting shorter.  The white stuff is just around the corner!

My bug has started Gr. 2, my baby is up, walking and talking and has settled nicely into her new daycare.  I'm honestly not sure how summer went by so quickly.

Homework, short weekends, shorter evenings, soon we will be hunkering down afraid to leave the house.  Boots, snow suits, driving nightmares...oh dear.  I'm getting antsy just thinking about it!

Tonight we are taking Jaden to his first concert.  Glass Tiger.  He may not recognize the music but typically he enjoys any kind of music with a good beat so hopefully he will enjoy himself!

Summer living

It's July and things are certainly different, but not depressingly so.  The transition back to work went much better than expected.  It was almost as if I had never left.  Only my desk chair seems to be missing.  I eased myself back in with a 2 day work week, followed by a full week and then almost a full week of vacation.  I will really jump in when I am back at work next week. 

The Bug and Dolly are doing extremely well at the caregivers.  It was a good decision to keep them together for the summer, Dolly isn't missing me which is the way I want it.  She sure is happy when I pick her and her brother up at the end of the day.  They are busy, playing outside and enjoying the company of the other kids. 

The past few days we have been enjoying some summer activities, we spent a day at the cottage, the weather wasn't awesome but we managed to have some fun in the boat, fishing, and a quick swim.  Daddy took the Bug to a star party last night.  They got to look at Saturn and stay up way past bed time. We had a pj day, cartoon marathon, really enjoyed the down time.

Time is passing quickly but we sure are enjoying ourselves!

Sappy stuff

I am feeling a bit sappy today.  I'm probably over tired because Baby Doll was little miss social last night.  She went to bed at her usual time but was up around 11:30 because she wanted to be with us apparently.  I had daddy go make her a bottle to hopefully encourage her to go back to sleep.  While he was downstairs she reached her arms to be picked up, so of course I obliged and was delighted to have her nuzzle her face into my neck, she wanted to cuddle.  Her head was turned towards me and she just looked up at me, closed her eyes for a bit and opened them again and smiled.  I sang her the first song that popped into my head, Barges, and she just looked at me, head still on my shoulder.  When that was done I switched to her favourite Nanny song, it's not really a song, just "doo dee doo" sounds, and out came some giggles.  It was such a beautiful moment.  I want to remember it forever.

Um what?

I only have two more months of leave before going back to work full time.  Um what?  WTF did the time go?  She was just born wasn't she?

I certainly will have mixed feelings.  I love my job.  I work at such a wonderful place with wonderful people doing something that really matters to me.  Helping children, helping parents.  I will miss my time at home with my two beautiful kids.  Nothing lasts forever and once the adjustment period is over I know I will be okay.  The anticipation is always the worst part.


It will push me
It will change me
It will not break me

Roasted chicken with vegetables

I'm not a very enthusiastic cook.  I really don't enjoy cooking at all.  There are however a few meals that I can throw together without much strain on my brain.  They are mostly dishes involving one pot and 10 ingredients or less.

You will need:

1 whole chicken
2 large white or yellow potatoes and/or sweet potatoes, cubed
2 carrots, peeled and cut into large pieces
1 onion, chopped
whole garlic cloves (a handful)
1/4 cup balsamic vinegar
1/4 cup water
2 tsp worcestershire sauce
1 bay leaf
fresh ground pepper

In a large roaster, place chicken in center, surround with chopped veggies, garlic at the top.  
Drizzle vinegar, sauce over all ingredients.  Add water slowly at the side of the dish, do not wash the sauces off the meat or veggies (as much as possible).  Grind pepper over everything.  Place bay leaf inside.
Cover and bake at 375 F for 1 hr 15 mins, or until juices from the leg are running clear.

N.B. I like to cook my chickens upside down.  That way it self bastes.

This is one of my families favourites.

Bon appétit!